Trying to get back into the groove.

I have slacked off for the last month and a half.  It started off with being sick, and spiraled down from there.  It is scary how easy it is to get out of the habit and backslide.  I am back to 203 pounds.  I am ashamed of myself.  People keep telling me how great I look, and I hate hearing it.  I feel awful, and I feel like I look awful.  I know I look better than I did a year ago, but I don't look as good as I did 2 months ago.  My friend tells me I should learn to take a compliment, but I don't deserve them.  Maybe if I get back into the swing of dieting and exercising, I will be more graceful about it, but not right now.  So, I gained back the 12 pounds that I lost this year.  Stupid.  Lazy. Time to get myself together, and get moving!  I have 9 weeks until vacation, and my goal was 175.  That is 28 pounds, instead of the 16 it would have been if I hadn't gained back the weight.  That is a little over 3 pounds a week.  Doable?  Impossible?  I guess we will find out!

I have been eating really well today, despite the giant basket over flowing with candy in my kitchen.  I did Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred.  I have been cleaning almost nonstop, and I still have the grocery shopping to do.  Good start to this!  I am going to try to be better.  I am really going to try to get this done!  I am going to try to start running at 6 a.m.  I want to try the Couch to 5K program.  I need to get a stopwatch for that, and I would like to get a new pair of running shoes.  I am optimistic!  I really want to do this!!!!